On Being Asian American Part II

Yesterday a historical marker in the US happened with regards to the conversation around racism. While arguments continue to happen whether this conviction is about racism or about a police officer who crossed training lines, or whether this was indeed justice or if it was influenced by the media narrative and politics, the point has been made - conversations about racism continue to be polarizing. Racism is a multi-faceted and complex subject that is full of emotions and history.

So I was debating whether I should do a follow-up blog. The media coverage on anti-Asian racism has already faded. It’s only been 4 weeks since the Atlanta shooting. During that time, however, a lot of pivotal events have been happening in our country. From the trials of Derek Chauvin to the recent lawsuit where 2 Virginia police officers used excessive force on a black Army officer during a traffic stop, to Daunte Wright, who got shot instead of tasered, the anti-Asian sentiment seems to be insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

But two things inspired me to continue writing about it.

1) I had a conversation with a mentor of mine who has become a friend. As a result of the first blog, we had some honest conversations about the issue of racism. It did exactly what I hoped it would do, create some understanding and some insight into each other. It’s easy to label people and dehumanize them in some fashion. We all do it. I could have introduced him as a white man, a conservative, and a previous Trump voter. Some people reading this article would immediately dismiss his thoughts on this conversation, while some will value it more. But in my mind, that is part of the problem - we find it hard to have conversations to listen and value the conversation for what it is - an exchange of ideas, experiences, opinions, and learning of each other. Regardless, my conversation with him was vulnerable, honest, and thoughtful. We have to remember that amidst all the different labels and tribes, we are humans, no less or no more worthy of being human than the other.

2) Recently, Higher Ground had another opportunity to collaborate with Tucson Unified School District (TUSD) to make education at TUSD more equitable. We sent the invitation out to TUSD Asian American, Pacific Islander, and Asian students. But the response was as I had expected; students were hesitant to talk about it. We had inquiries about it, and the common concern is that it was virtual, and others might see it. However, we did manage to talk to two courageous students. And their honesty was compelling. At the end of the one-hour session, they both said the same thing; more Asians need to talk about this.

So here it is, the 2nd part of why I say that anti-Asian racism is much more complex. Today, I’d like to explore the conversations we had with the TUSD students and some of my conversations with fellow Asians in the United States.

Let me start with the discomfort that every Asian I have spoken with about this topic. It was interesting to observe this even among the TUSD students. Every Asian I have spoken with is uncomfortable calling our experiences racism. We avoid using the word racism, almost like a stigma we don’t want to be placed on us. Whenever we had to label our experience as racism, we tried to justify the use of the word or even replace it as if another word would better describe it.

I also consistently heard the idea that racism seems like a strong word to describe our experiences. All of us share a time we experienced something we brushed off and years later realize, “Wait, that’s racism.” Whenever we experienced it, we simply thought it was weird, funny, or ignored it.

Some of us got called dog-eater, and we still refused to call it racism. Someone was consistently made fun of in school and had stickers placed on them that said “made in China,” and we still struggled to call that racism. We shared how we got called dirty, and yet, we still could not comfortably call that experience racism.We talked about our citizenship getting questioned, getting mocked for the food we ate, and getting bullied for our accent. Yet, we still could not comfortably call it racism. This became more troubling as I watched young people, still in high school, have the same discomfort acknowledging that what they experienced was the definition of racism.

Then there is the model minority. Being Asian meant we are good in math, good in school, and we are going to succeed. Both adults and youth described how it did not feel like racism because they said good things about us. It almost made us beam with pride. But over time, we realized how terrible this really was.

Asians, as the model minority, are often weaponized to be used against other minorities. This idea that because Asians are successful despite being a minority has become a key argument that people use against systemic racism. People use Asians as examples of people who can work hard and become successful; therefore, everyone else should be able to. This dismisses the fact that many Asians live in poverty. They limit the definition of Asians as Japanese, Korean, or Chinese, ignoring the fact that Asians represent 50+ nationalities - including Afghani and Iranian from Central Asia; Samoan, Guamanian, and native Hawai'ian from the Pacific Islands; Pakistani, Bangladeshi, Indian, and Sri Lankan from South Asia; Korean, Japanese, and Chinese from East Asia; Mien, Vietnamese, Cambodian, Thai, Burmese, Malay, and Filipinos from Southeast Asia. These different Asians have completely different languages, cultures, histories, and practices. To say that all Asians are successful is simply a lie. Many of the Asians I mentioned are refugees or living in poverty.

It also pits other minorities against Asians. Asians are not considered minorities by other people. Just about 2 years ago, articles still existed on whether Asians should be considered white. I have been in conversations with other minorities where they point out that as an Asian minority, we have it good.

This complicates things for many reasons. For one, in my experience, Asian racism is equally perpetuated by other minorities. I have experienced resentment from other minorities because I am Asian. Several peers and the youth brought up how, for Asians who do not fit the typical Asian look, they didn’t experience certain comments until they told their friends they were Asian. In other words, we were accepted because we looked Hispanic. But the moment people realized we were Asian, they began treating us differently.

However, I think the most eye-opening comment that the youth made is a statement that I have heard repeated by the Asian adults I have spoken with. “This is the first time I have talked about this.” Perhaps part of why racism against Asians has not been highlighted is that Asians are often quiet about it. I’ve often wondered why. Maybe it’s because Asians benefit from the model minority myth and feel that it is better to stay quiet since it’s not “too bad.” Or perhaps it’s because many Asian cultures are taught to be quiet, reasonable, and assimilated.

I remember working with TUSD and other schools at different times doing youth forums around different topics - from law enforcement roles in schools and as it relates to racism, to poverty, to student representation, to legislation affecting education. We have always had a robust response. Youth want to talk and speak up. Often we have had to keep a certain format to ensure that everyone’s voice is heard. But with this recent attempt to have a youth forum around the anti-Asian sentiment, the Asian American Pacific Islander and Asian student community response was different. There was hesitation, fear, and even the ones willing to be a part of it continued to ask whether it was safe. And yet, once the conversations around anti-Asian sentiment began, I always get the same response - we need to talk more about this in our own Asian communities.

There is so much more to unpack in this subject matter. As I stated at the beginning of this post, racism is a complex conversation with multi-facets and with all of us playing some role in it. So when it comes to anti-Asian racism, the conversation needs to at least start happening.